Hi Poppi - what a fantastic 100wc, and I love that you started off with a Two Pairs sentence! :-) I also like that you leave your story on a question - it makes the readers want to find out more. Do remember to check that punctuation - are there any bits missing? Mr K :-)
Hello Poppi, what a super opening to such an exciting piece of writing. You had me gripped right form the start with your action opener and I loved the use of a 2 pair sentence (am I right that is what you used?). You read with lovely expression too Poppi, I really enjoyed listening to this challenge. Like Mr Kenyon, I like the way you have ended on a question...making me want to read on. Clever writing. I did notice you repeated an adverb - can you spot which one and think of a different one to use. I look forward to seeing next week's challenge Poppi. Mrs Duxbury
Hi Poppi - what a fantastic 100wc, and I love that you started off with a Two Pairs sentence! :-) I also like that you leave your story on a question - it makes the readers want to find out more. Do remember to check that punctuation - are there any bits missing?
ReplyDeleteMr K :-)
Hello Poppi,
ReplyDeletewhat a super opening to such an exciting piece of writing. You had me gripped right form the start with your action opener and I loved the use of a 2 pair sentence (am I right that is what you used?).
You read with lovely expression too Poppi, I really enjoyed listening to this challenge. Like Mr Kenyon, I like the way you have ended on a question...making me want to read on. Clever writing.
I did notice you repeated an adverb - can you spot which one and think of a different one to use. I look forward to seeing next week's challenge Poppi.
Mrs Duxbury